Alignment of Infinite Faecal Gateways

from Fifty Shades of Poo by Bumilingus

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lyrics

Behold, pathetic mortals! My masterpiece is now complete!

I have constructed
A myriad network of subspace gateways
Each one a triumph of galactic engineering
An astral pipeline through cosmic relativity
Yet their cargo a sinister load
For at the end of each a wormhole opens
Inside the rectal passage of all living creatures
The greatest faecal corridor known to all creation

My motives - diabolical
My intellect - astronomical!

Meanwhile on an anonymous moon
Orbiting the planet Saturn
I have constructed the chamber of your incarceration
Wherein you are strapped to a medical table
You are not the first victim
Merely the latest in an endless line
Of subjects of my experimentation
You cannot begin to comprehend
The importance of my science
So please lie back and enjoy
The horror that awaits you

I am the poo progeny of Newton!
I am the scatological disciple of Einstein!
I am the faecal neophyte of Hawking!
I am a god made flesh!

With engineering skills beyond the ken of mortal men
I open a wormhole in your esophagus
Interlinked with the myriad astral gateways
A final genius moment of mathematics
And the subspace floodgates open

The entire multiverse shits itself into your throat!